Different Kind of Fear

Not afraid to crawl in dark caves
Ride through crashing blue waves
No fear of dangerous stormy nights
Or to break up ferocious dog fights

Avoided ugly words spit at me
Self esteem became overly weak
Cried until red eyes were stung
Held my forever bitter tongue

Anxiety has crept into my head
Nauseated belly landed me in bed
Rooms spun like merry go round
Refused my feet to touch the ground

Fear that can’t be explained
Made me crazy but not insane
Face flushed with cold sweat
Grabbed my box of cigarettes

Minutes turned into lengthy hours
Pink roses became dead flowers
Bleak darkness tried to pull me in
Black hole full of awful devilish sin

Fought back to see bright light
Spirit stronger than weak sight
Lovely angels rescued my soul
Peace brought me back in control

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The Daughter

bible

Go ahead…
Don’t hesitate dear one
Release your fiery arrow
And let it fly into the lies
That you and others
Have told you about yourself
Lies destined to imprison you
Within the deepest…darkest
Parts of your being
Where you’ve been subjected
To the haunting whispers
That have poisoned you
Against yourself
For far too long
And let your beauty
Shine in the light
Of your soul
As you rise with the smoke
From the lies
That have been set aflame
In your bid for freedom
To exist…
As the precious creation
That God sees
Every time He looks upon you
The daughter…
That He destined you to be
Before the foundations of the earth!!!

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Filed under Haunting Whispers

Long Distance love

Paris

My babe writes about her love for me and tells me of her life in Paris, describing the cavernous drinking holes and Parisian cafés and the differently colored rooms that she writes from.
She is sad because I am a thousand miles away on the other side of the Atlantic, but I recognize other sadness that has more to do with love itself between her lines.
The more passionately she writes, the more her fears and doubts seem to lurk in little pockets of unsaid grey areas that are only evident in spite of her belief in the love.
For sure, to love is to fear, and she writes as if to iron out the doubts and make the feelings she has for me and the insecurity that comes with us not being together into something that is reassuring in its realness.
Her writing is antidote and she writes as if to create reality, the more words the more solid and believable of our love.

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Filed under My Babe